CHINESE WHISPER!!! - Norwich Arts Centre have revealed plans to make the venue "more echoey", using special "money traps". We spoke to venue manager "Stuart Ian", who told us "our understanding is that if you throw enough money into a bottomless pit, then the venue will magically start making a profit." When asked what this had to do with making the venue more echoey, Ian Stuart said "how the bally hell should I know! I just thought I'd make it sound even more echoey so I could see the looks of frustration on band members faces! Now, fill out this Escalator form, and I'll give you £5000, no questions asked, just like I have done for everyone else I know!".
At this point, our reporter walked out, but he shouted down the corridor "and if you're in two bands, I'll give you £10,000, and you can use all the money to fly one of the bands to South By South West, just like "********" did!
At this point, he winked, drank the bar dry, and booked the same 4 local bands for all the upcoming gigs in the next 6 months..
***We can't reveal which band/s he was talking about, for legal reasons, and because we here at "Norwich Music Rumours Uncovered!!!" are fans of both bands.***
Keep supporting local music everyone!